Spring entered 4 events for Solo and Ensemble this year. She played a trumpet solo, cello solo, trumpet trio, and cello trio. She has worked really hard for quite a few months preparing for these events. It was an exciting day for her. She did amazing on her cello solo and then moved on for her trumpet solo. Nerves got to her a bit and she had trouble at some points getting the sounds out...the buzzing just stopped. She persevered and finished the piece but I could tell she was disappointed, frustrated, and worried as the song progressed.
As soon as she finished she picked up her music, covered her face with it, and tears began streaming. She took off out of the room and I tried to follow. Man, can she ever walk fast. She was just trying to find the closest exit. When we were finally outside we talked some. She was frustrated because it was the worse she felt she had ever played. She was disappointed and angry with herself, and a bit embarrassed. She was worried Mr. Newman would be disappointed in her. I tried to assure that all great musicians have performances like this. I told her this is where her grit and character come through...could she move on and perform in her next 2 events? We talked about what she could learn from it and so forth.
She finally felt she was ready to go back inside. As we got inside each of the directors put their arms around her and encouraged her. They could encourage her and give her feedback in ways that I could not because I don't speak "music" like they do. She really is surrounded by amazing mentors and teachers.
As it all turned out, she received Superior ratings on ALL 4 performances! The adjudicator for the trumpet solo noted that she was obviously prepared, she had great tone (which she has been really working on for the last year or so), fingering was perfect...nerves caused her to press her lips too tightly which makes it impossible to buzz. The directors were very pleased that the adjudicator saw beyond the nerves and rated her accordingly.
More than anything I am grateful for the lessons she learned today. She learned that we all make mistakes and the test of character is what we do when we make mistakes. She could have easily quit halfway through her piece but she didn't. In talking to her she even said that thought never crossed her mind. She learned that there is more to a performance than what meets the eye. She learned she has great friends that buoyed her up when she was feeling down. She learned she can be that friend to others as well. She was reminded how much her directors love her. She learned that her intense work on her tone has paid off as she has improved leaps and bounds in that area this last year. She learned that at the end of the day all that really matters is if you did your very best in all you do.
And I learned, once again, that my mom heart can be torn and broken time and time again as I watch our children go through painful experiences in life. It would be easier to shield them from such experiences, but once again I learned how grateful I am that I can be by their side to listen to them and love them as they learn these life lessons on their way to becoming who our Father in Heaven knows they will become.
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